Who Wins Dwts Season 23

So, you want to know who wins Dancing with the Stars Season 23? Grab a latte and settle in, because the answer is less “ballroom miracle” and more “sweet, glorious chaos.” We’re talking about the season where a former NFL player and a pop star tangoed for the trophy, while a reality TV villain somehow didn’t get voted off the first week. Spoiler alert: the winner was Laurie Hernandez, the Olympic gymnast, and her partner, Val Chmerkovskiy. Yes, a 16-year-old girl with a gold medal and zero fear of the judges took home the Mirrorball.

Let’s rewind, because nobody saw that coming—at least, not with this much drama. The season kicked off with Jana Kramer crying about her divorce, Marilu Henner remembering every step from 1985, and Calvin Johnson Jr. (a.k.a. Megatron) looking like a giant who accidentally wandered onto a wedding dance floor. But the real story? The five-foot-three gymnast who could do a backflip in heels before breakfast. Laurie hit the stage like a caffeinated hummingbird, and the audience went bonkers.

The Contenders: A Motley Crew of Stars

First, there was James Hinchcliffe, the "Indy 500" driver who almost died in a crash and then decided to learn the cha-cha. His legs were built for speed, not samba, but he danced like a man who cheated death and was not going to lose to a teenager. Then came Jake T. Austin, the kid from "Wizards of Waverly Place," who danced like a confused puppy—all charm, zero technique. And let’s not forget Amber Rose, who showed up looking fabulous and immediately got eliminated. The show is ruthless like that.

But the wild card was Ryan Lochte, the Olympic swimmer who, uh, had a complicated summer in Rio. The audience booed him during his first dance. Yes, booed. A man in sequins doing a waltz, and the crowd was hissing like a pack of angry cats. Yet, by the second week, Ryan’s partner, Cheryl Burke, practically karate-chopped the haters into submission. They made it to fourth place. That’s a more surprising comeback than the 2004 Red Sox.

The Moment It All Clicked

Here’s the kicker: Laurie Hernandez didn’t just win because she was a gymnast. She won because she made everyone laugh. In one dance, she did a lift that literally looked like her partner tossed her into the ceiling. The judges gasped, then wept, then gave her a perfect score. Meanwhile, James Hinchcliffe was doing a perfect tango with a prosthetic leg (okay, not really, but his footwork was that sharp). The final three were Laurie, James, and Calvin Johnson Jr., who somehow conquered the rumba despite being built like a refrigerator.

Calvin’s journey is a masterpiece of absurdity. Picture a 6-foot-5, 240-pound wide receiver who earned the nickname “Megatron” for destroying defenses. Now picture him doing the samba in a pink ruffled shirt. He was so stiff at first that his hips moved like a rusty gate. But by the semifinals, he was using that massive frame to dip his partner, Lindsay Arnold, like a dipsy-doodle magician. The audience screamed. He came in third, which is basically a win when you’re a giant who learned the foxtrot in six weeks.

The Finale: Tears, Tinsel, and a Trophy

The finale was a nonstop circus of emotion. James Hinchcliffe danced a freestyle that made him look like a human sparkler—all energy, no stopping. Laurie did a routine that involved flipping onto Val’s shoulders, then doing a cartwheel, then smiling like she’d just stolen a cookie. When the winner was announced, Laurie fell to her knees and cried. Actually, sobbed. Val picked her up like a rag doll and spun her around. The Mirrorball was hers.

But here’s the surprising truth: Season 23 was the youngest winner in the show’s history. Laurie was 16. The previous youngest was Shawn Johnson, who was 17 when she won. That’s a kid taking home a trophy that weighs more than her suitcase. Also, Laurie is Puerto Rican, and she’s openly gay—which, in 2016, was a big, bold deal on a primetime ABC show. She didn’t hide it; she just danced and won. That’s a win for everyone who’s ever felt like a weirdo in a glitter dress.

The Aftermath: What Happened Next?

Laurie went on to host a Nickelodeon show and became a bona fide role model. James Hinchcliffe did a spin-off, and Calvin Johnson went back to being a football legend. But the real legacy of Season 23 is the dance-off between a swimmer and a bad reputation. Oh, and let’s not forget: The season’s most shocking elimination was Marilu Henner in week seven. She had perfect memory, but the audience had perfect forgetfulness when it came to her votes. Ouch.

To wrap it up: Laurie Hernandez won because she was too good, too young, and too much fun to ignore. She danced like she was born in a ballroom, even though she was actually born in a gym. The season was a glorious mess of tears, sequins, and a giant man doing the samba. If you missed it, you missed a masterclass in how a 16-year-old can single-handedly make a whole country believe that a waltz is a contact sport. The Mirrorball is hers, and she’ll never give it back.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch that freestyle dance again. I need to laugh at Calvin’s furrowed-brow face during the rumba. Classic.