Knight Of The Seven Kingdoms Family Tree
Alright, pull up a chair and grab a drink that’s probably stronger than milk, because we’re diving into the most tangled family tree in all of Westeros: the one from Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. You thought your cousin’s wedding seating chart was messy? Buddy, the Targaryens and their hedge knight pals invented chaos. This isn’t just a family tree; it’s more like a family bush that’s been set on fire by a dragon.
Let’s start at the top, with the Dunk and Egg dynamic duo. Ser Duncan the Tall—the lankiest, most earnest oaf in the realm—is our hero. Spoiler: he’s not actually tall because of good genes; he’s tall because he ate all the shepherd’s pies in the Reach. And his squire, Egg, is actually Prince Aegon Targaryen, the future King Aegon V. That’s right: the biggest secret in Westerosi history was that a homeless knight was babysitting a future dragon king who loved shaving his head.
The Targaryen Mess (a.k.a. The Incest Express)
Egg’s real family is a glorious dumpster fire. His father was Prince Maekar Targaryen, a grumpy dude who threw a mace at his brother’s head during a trial by combat. Family game night must have been brutal. Maekar’s dad was King Daeron II, who was so obsessed with Dornish peace that he married a Dornish princess and let her family teach his sons how to poison people gracefully.
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But here’s the mind-blowing part: Egg’s brothers included Aerion Brightflame, the guy who drank wildfire because he thought he was a dragon. Spoiler: he wasn’t. He died screaming. Then there was Daeron the Drunk, who preferred wine over ruling, and Aemon, who became a maester at the Wall. So Egg—the bald squire—was literally the only sane one in a family of pyromaniacs and alcoholics. No pressure, kid.
The Hedge Knight’s Secret Roots
Now, for the twist your brain didn’t see coming: Ser Duncan the Tall wasn’t actually a nobody. George R.R. Martin, you sneaky devil. Through Fire & Blood, we learn that Duncan’s father was a stableboy at the Red Keep—or maybe a sellsword? The point is: Duncan’s family tree is almost as secret as his height. But wait—there’s a theory that Dunk’s grandfather was a Targaryen bastard named Ser Duncan the Sworn? Yeah, Martin loves his parallels.
What we do know: Dunk fathered a daughter who married into the House of Tarth. Yes, you read that right. Brienne of Tarth—the beastly badass from Game of Thrones—is Ser Duncan the Tall’s great-granddaughter. That means her unshakeable honor, her weirdly tall frame, and her ability to punch a man through a wall are all Dunk’s legacy. The Maid of Tarth is basically a blonde, giant, female version of a hedge knight who couldn’t read. Mind. Blown.
How It All Connects to The Main Show
This family tree isn’t just for nerds—it’s the secret backstory of everything you love. When Brienne is knighted by Jaime Lannister, she’s fulfilling the ghost oath of her great-grandpa Dunk, who always dreamed of knighthood. When Daenerys Targaryen goes mad? That’s the wildfire-drinking Aerion’s psycho gene skipping generations like a bad flu.
Even little Arya Stark is connected. Her sword Needle is modeled after a design Dunk’s friend used. And the White Walkers? They’re the result of Aemon Targaryen (Egg’s brother) sending a raven to the Wall about a prophecy that went wrong. Talk about a family tree with rotten fruit.
The Real Joke: You’re All Related to Someone
Here’s the funniest truth: nearly every major character in Game of Thrones is a distant cousin of Dunk or Egg. Jon Snow? His dad was Rhaegar Targaryen, whose great-great-uncle was Egg. Jaime and Cersei? Their Lannister blood has a Targaryen ancestor who married into the line through a daughter of Egg’s cousin. It’s like a medieval version of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, except everyone’s dead or burning something.
So when you watch Knight of the Seven Kingdoms (the upcoming show), remember: you’re watching a story about a short king with a bald head and a tall dumbass with a big heart. They’re the reason Brienne is a good person, the reason Daenerys went crazy, and the reason your favorite character probably died. And that, my friends, is the best kind of family drama—one that ends with dragons, oaths, and a whole lot of irony.
Now go watch the show. Or read the book. Or argue with your friends about whether Dunk’s daughter had a second child. Just remember: in Westeros, everyone’s tree is on fire. But at least this one’s hilariously on fire, with a side of crispy dragon wings.