Who Won House Of Games This Week

Okay, grab your tea (or whatever you’re pretending is a grown-up drink) and let’s dive into the big question. You know the one. That burning, slightly ridiculous question that has been keeping you up at night: Who won House of Games this week? I’ve done the hard work—watched five episodes, shouted at the telly, and taken notes. Let’s break it down like we’re gossiping about a friend’s truly wild group project.

The Contenders (Aka the Lovable Misfits)

We had a genuinely delightful lineup this week. There wasn’t a single sideways glance or passive-aggressive comment about the scoring. Shock. You had the perky comedian who laughed at her own jokes before anyone else did. Then there was the sporty one who kept flexing for no reason between rounds.

And, of course, the token brainy one who wore glasses and a look of constant mild panic. Honestly, it was like watching a reality show about a tense book club. But with more buzzers and questionable clues about flags.

The Wild Card Round (When Things Got Juicy)

If you blinked during “Highbrow–Lowbrow,” you missed utter chaos. Seriously. One contestant guessed that “The Great Gatsby” was a type of pasta. I am not joking. Richard Osman’s face? A masterpiece of controlled British horror.

But the real drama happened in “The Rap Battle.” Sporty guy tried to rhyme “cabbage” with “savage” and it actually worked. The crowd went wild. By “crowd,” I mean my cat looked up from her nap, annoyed.

Meanwhile, brainy lady finally snapped and answered a geography question before the music stopped. She slammed the buzzer so hard the table shook. Respect. Pure, unadulterated respect.

The Final Scoreboard (Drumroll, Please)

Right, let’s get to the point. After five days of banter, baffling wrong answers, and one truly aggressive game of “Dingbats,” the winner was... Susie McCabe. Yes, the perky comedian. She didn’t just scrape by—she dominated.

She finished with a whopping 46 points. That’s almost a full day’s worth of points if you’re bad at math (like me). The sporty one came second with 38, and brainy lady was third with 35. The nice, quiet one who just smiled a lot? Last place, but he won the “Nicest Contestant” award in my heart.

How Did She Pull It Off?

Susie’s secret weapon? She didn’t overthink. While brainy lady was still analyzing the question for hidden metaphors, Susie just shouted a random answer. And half the time she was right. It’s infuriating, isn’t it?

She also mastered the art of the distraction tactic. In “Answer Smash,” she’d start telling a joke about her mum to throw off the competition. It worked. The other contestants were laughing so hard they forgot to buzz in. Cheeky genius.

She even won the “Starter for Ten” round without flinching. She answered a question about the periodic table while eating a biscuit. The absolute audacity.

The Moments We’ll Never Forget

Beyond the winner’s crown, this week gave us gifts. Who can forget when the sporty one confidently identified the capital of Australia as “Sydney”? The silence in that room was deafening. Even the audience (us) yelled, “CANBERRA!”

And let’s talk about the final round, “The Missing Vowels.” It lasted so long I started second-guessing my life choices. Contestants stared at a blank screen like it held the secrets to the universe. “Is it... I... think I see a T?” No, Susan, you don’t.

But the best moment? When Richard Osman handed Susie the golden trophy (the one that looks like a magic wand from a budget toy shop). She held it up and said, “I’ll use this to open my post.” Winning with style.

So, What Did We Learn?

If there’s a moral to this week, it’s this: Don't be too clever. Or too competitive. Be quick, be funny, and for goodnes sake, bring a biscuit to eat during the hard questions. It throws off your rivals’ concentration. It’s science.

Also, never trust a contestant who looks too relaxed. Susie McCabe smiled through the entire show. She smiled when she got a question wrong. She smiled when the scoreboard glitched. That’s the face of a champion, my friend. Or a serial killer. But definitely a champion.

So next week, when you’re sitting on your sofa, shouting at people who are actually in a TV studio, remember: It’s not about winning the points. It’s about the snacks, the silly guesses, and the joy of watching someone else do the hard work for you. Congratulations, Susie. You’re our queen of chaos this week.

Now, go make a cup of tea. We’ve got another week to obsess over.